The better we know ourselves, the better we can problem solve, or handle situations that life throws at us.
Becoming self aware and knowing who you are is imperative, if we want to teach our children to become strong, confident and powerful individuals. Therefore, this inner work begins with us.
We are not here to provide them with only shelter, food and clothes on their backs, but we have a larger responsibility to teach them about discovering their inner worlds.
As human beings, the closer we are to ourselves, the more we have gained self awareness, the better we are able to create a life of meaning, fulfillment and happiness. You cant truly become fulfilled if you don’t know who you are.
So lets begin the work of self discovery and gain some self awareness.
Gaining Self Awareness
Determine Your Internal Dialogue.
Internal Dialogue is usually refers to a conversation that takes place that is ‘inner’ and ‘unspoken’ but amounts to a conversation anyway. …
It is dialogue because it is a conversation. Therefore internal dialogue can be explained roughly as an inner conversation (usually with the self).
Have you heard of such a thing? An Internal Dialoge, you know that voice that speaks to you when its just you all by yourself. The one that tells you, you are either doing a good job, or not so good of a job.
The one that tells you in murmurs, that you are getting fat, or that tells you “damn, you look fine!”
That’s the internal dialogue of your mind, the monkey mind as the great Dalai Lama refers to. Do you know how your internal dialogue usually goes? Is it more negative or more positive?
If you don’t know, pay attention. It talks you at every moment, even if your conscious mind doesnt notice, your subconscious mind does.
And takes all of the things your internal dialogue speaks about to heart, over time, with compounding effects, it reflects within our actions and our words.
This is where we want to be attentive to, since our internal dialogue has such power over our lives, it is best that we take power over our internal dialogue.
First we must determine, what kind of internal dialogue do you have… is it negative or positive?
Determine Your Core Values.
According to Yourdictionary.com, Core Values are the fundamental beliefs of a person or organization. These guiding principles dictate behavior and can help people understand the difference between right and wrong.
Determining your core values means you get to know what is important to you, what are your emotional boundaries are and how your relationships play out in your life.
Our core values determine the decisions we make, the relationship we tolerate and most importantly how we love ourselves. If you don’t know what your core values are, its best that you do some self discovery when it comes to this.
Core Values can range from being Patient, Responsible, Respectful, Justice, Fairness, Family, Connection, Integrity, Honest and Trust.
You can choose what ever core values you think is important to you, how to determine what your core values are is easy.
All you do, is look at a situation that has once made you cut off or broken a relationship, for instance, i had a best friend for years, she and I started hanging out with one of her friends from high school, we all got really close and never once did she tell me, they had relations with each other. It upset me because i heard the news from him, someone I barely met.
In this example, Trust and Communication was broken, these are core values that I find important in my relationships.
Now what instance have you had where you were taken back by the situation?
Was there mistreatment, did some get disrespect was there unfairness in the situation?
What pisses you off, usually is a emotional guide to your core values and that one of your core values was dismissed.
Valuing who you are means, you get to place importance on your core values, meaning if your core values aren’t met by the people you’re in relationships with you, that means you are either not holding your core values steadfast and standing your ground, reflecting poor self confidence or self power.
On the other hand, if you are quick to communicate your displeased about someone not maintaining or respecting your core values, that implies to the other person that you know who you are, you will stand for what you believe in and they will either respect that or no longer be in relationship with you.
Either way, its a win, because you stand in your power thus giving you self confidence and loving who you are.
This kind of self love, will resonate within how you treat other people and most importantly how you treat your children.
Conclusion
There is a lot of work to do when discovering who you are. But its so much rewards that become available to you and a whole new world opens up to you.
Dr. Carl Jung said it best, you are happiest when what you feel, what you think and what you say coincide with one another, to do that you must know yourself, your personal boundaries and what you find important to you through your core values.
Becoming self aware is the best gift you give to yourself, your families and can change the generational behaviors that you pass on to your bloodline.
Remember, Connect & Share!
Your Mommy Blogger,
-Maria
